The Dilemma with Friends and Work: Part 1
Some of you may have noticed that I haven’t posted in more than two weeks. Besides catching up on my post-Olympics sleep and changing my internal clock back to the good ol’ PST, I have been job hunting. Now those of you who have been in a post-secondary institution for a while probably have made a few friends. Usually, they are good folks you meet in your faculty or programs. I am no different. However, it never occurred to me that when we get out, those same good folks become your competition. After all, the better friends you are, the more you likely have in common with each other, which means the more likely you’ll end up working in the same field. In an ideal world, you would go hand in resumes together with your buddy, get interviewed and eventually hired together at the same time. But of course, we can’t all be Henrik and Daniel Sedin so something else has to happen.
I found myself in a similar scenario…only it wasn’t just a classmate, it was a friend I’ve known my whole life. Being analytical for perhaps the second time in my life, I quickly scanned my current situation:
a. Sam gets job, friend doesn’t.
b. Friend gets job, Sam doesn’t.
c. We both don’t get the job.
It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that out of all those options, both sides cannot be happy. The philosopher in me would say: “that’s life”. However, the mathematician in me says: “they said 1/0 was impossible but calculus students do it all the time”. Truth be told, thoughts like giving up the position or vice versa have crossed my mind (then again, so did becoming the first professional Chinese Canadian basketball player) but I don’t think most people like pity-employment. Not the employers, and not the employees. Generally speaking, job seekers want jobs where they feel that they can bring something to the company, not because the other options were up too late blogging and slept in. So, taking one step backwards and looking at the bigger picture, giving the full effort probably works out for everybody’s best interests.
It’s not all bad though, because the way I look at it, if my friend gets the job, I could probably get some free marble slab out of this experience. And if I get it, I’m sure to treat her to a nice ice cream sundae at Mickey D’s as well (what can I say, I’m a poor student). And if the dreaded option c occurs? Well, then we go home for dinner because our moms have jobs.
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